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"And the winner for most handsome and best smelling film critic is... Vince Mancini!"

Vince looked around, uncertain how he'd got here but surrounded by smiles, well wishes, and jealousy. He stood as strangers clapped him on the shoulders and shook his hand. When he looked uncertain an usher gently directed him to the stage.

He strode up and approached the announcer, who he now realized was Warren Beatty. This caused him to slow down, and the lights seemed to dim. As he continued to approach, time seemed to go in slow-motion while Beatty reached below his own neck, peeling off a mask to reveal Matt Lieb in blackface.

"KEEP MAH WAIFFFFFE'S NAME OUT OF YOUR MOUTH!" Matt shouted, rearing back for a monumental slap.

Before he could, Laremy emerged from Matt's chest, leaned to the mic and whispered "the real winner was actually Raspberry Beret from that San Francisco paper. Syke!"

Vince started awake, shouting. His wife rolled over sleepily. "That same dream again?"

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Hello, I randomly thought of 'Crispus Buttocks' and then googled it, and I found your twitter. I figured you would be a sex worker but you were not. Anyway, I thought the husband in Past Lives could have gotten a nom

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Listen, don't count a man down till he's out. I bet Vince wouldn't say no to 20 bucks.

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I'm going to be suspended for making credible threats of violence in support of May December. My favorite movie from this year.

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I think you’ll love American Fiction, Vince. It should win the Oscar for “most misleading trailer... but is actually better than the trailer leads you to believe”

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Oh it seems extremely my shit.

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I'm looking forward to it! Think its streaming next week.

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I hate 'I can't believe you haven't seen x...' messages, but I hope your oldest is old enough to watch the Spiderverse movie! It's rad.

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Anatomy of a Fall was probably the best movie of year, and this year was stacked. Pretty down the line for the Oscars.

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Thoughts!

PICTURE - I've seen everything except Maestro and Zone, and while I was cooler on Past Lives than most, all eight ranged from good to great. Solid selections for a really good movie year, can't think of anything I'd sub in. I'm guessing it's Oppy.

DIRECTOR - Agreed on both snubs and the winner.

ACTOR - Insanely stacked. Colman's not winning (great performance in a mediocre movie!), but incredibly, he's the second gay actor ever nominated for a gay role in this category (the last one was Ian McKellen in Gods and Monsters). I think Cillian takes this, but I'd be thrilled if Paul got it.

ACTRESS - Yeah, where's Margot, and WTF Nyad? Hope Lily takes this, would be fine if Emma did. My husband hates Carey Mulligan, so I appreciate the sideswipes.

SUPPORTING ACTOR - Another insanely stacked list where I'd be happy if anyone won. But with Charles Melton out/snubbed, no way RDJ doesn't take it.

SUPPORTING ACTRESS - Da'Vine, deserved.

ORIGINAL - I assume Past Lives gets the consolation prize here.

ADAPTED - Zero chance they're not giving this to Nolan, and it WAS probably the best screenplay of the year.

ANIMATED - I dug Nimona, but it's not winning. I liked Elemental more than you, but it's not winning. I assume it'll be Spider-Man (love the look, not the screenplay) or Heron (didn't see).

THE REST - I assume Barbie's picking up everything it's nominated for below the line, which, fine. I didn't love The Creator, but it was insanely impressive looking for its budget, so I hope it wins those. Ninety-Five Senses is from the Napoleon Dynamite people.

If we get a Best Of post at some point, I'll shout out some other movies I loved that were never gonna get nominated. I can't believe we have to wait until March 10th for the ceremony. Awards season should be wrapped up by Valentine's Day at the latest.

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How would you have liked to see Past Lives end?

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They should’ve kissed. Just a lil.

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Maybe a cheeky slap on the ass when she turns away? Or a tasteful breast cup?

You little perv

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They've been platonically in love their entire lives and they don't even go in for a lil quick taste? Just to see what it's like? C'mon.

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You know, people forget that the brain is the biggest erogenous zone.

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I found it perfect.

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I thought that Lily Gladstone’s performance was more impressive but Emma Stone’s was showier.

Also, I may be in the minority here (and, to be fair, I was probably in the VERY early stages of COVID) but until Mark Ruffalo shows up poor things was so self-indulgent (and I say this as someone who adores David Lynch movies and shows) and attempting to be transgressive that I was ready to start hating it. But it really improves once Ruffalo shows up.

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"American Fiction" was really fun, but surprised to see Sterling K Brown nominated for something from it. (Didn't feel like one of the roles that does, even tho he was really having fun with it.)

I had no idea it was mostly set in Boston going in, and people audibly gasped when one scene was shot on literally the same block as the theater we were in, lol. "That's where we are!"

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I kinda want to see Ruffalo win, just because he was having so much *fun* playing against type as a complete DASTARD.

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I could have sworn Giamatti was nominated for SIDEWAYS, but now I see it was just supporting actors that were nominated. Weird.

When's your definitive Pixar-ranking listicle coming out?

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Annette Bening did a good job in 'Nyad' though my list is different.

Best Movie: ‘Past Lives’

Best Action: ‘The Killer’

Best Comedy: ‘The Persian Version’

Best Crime: ‘Anatomy of a Fall’

Best Dialogue: ‘Sanctuary’

Best Fantasy: ‘Creation of the Gods I - Kingdom of Storms’

Best Horror: ‘Divinity’

Best Indie: ‘The Artifice Girl’

Best Romance: ‘Past Lives’

Best Sci-Fi: ‘The Artifice Girl’

and

Most Inspiring: ‘A Million Miles Away’

Most Infuriating: ‘Partygate’

Most Interesting Character: Neri Hashioka in ‘Bad Lands’ (played by Japan’s Sakura Ando)

Most Frustrating Character: Samet in ‘About Dry Leaves’ (played by Deniz Celiloğlu)

Most Memorable Scene: The bathtub lick in ‘Saltburn’

and

Best Child Actor: Eden Dambrine (‘Close')

Best Child Actress: Abby Ryder Fortson (‘Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret?’)

Best Actors: Joaquinn Phoenix (‘Beau is Afraid’) and Leonardo DiCaprio (‘Killers of the Flower Moon’)

Best Actresses: Leonie Benesch ('The Teachers' Lounge') & Kim Si-Eun I (‘Next Sohee’) & Tilda Swinton (‘The Eternal Daughter’

https://wickedmike.substack.com/p/60-best-movies-of-2023-english-foreign-language

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cmon inside out is NOT one of the worst pixar movies. two cars sequels? incredibles 2? fucking lightyear?

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Incredibles 2 and Lightyear are absolutely better than Inside Out.

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The Cars sequel is right though

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Cars is so different that I have a hard time comparing those to Pixar movies. It's more like Pixar just said fuck it and made a Dreamworks movie.

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lightyear was p good! i watched it while riding a stationary bike but still

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I liked it too.

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Incredibles 2 is really good, it just has the disadvantage of being compared to something phenomenal.

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Loved Da’Vine Joy Randolph in Only Murders in the Building, so I have to assume she owns every scene of The Holdovers she's in. I mean swipes it clean.

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