Welcome to The #Content Report, a newsletter by Vince Mancini. I’ve been writing about movies, culture, and food since the aughts. Now I’m delivering it straight to you, with none of the autoplay videos, takeover ads, or chumboxes of the ad-supported internet, and all of the dumb jokes, occasional toilet humor, and general brand un-friendliness. Support my work and help me bring back the cool internet by subscribing, sharing, commenting, and keeping it real.
I think way back when, there was Michael Cera and then Jesse Eisenburg emerged and made Michael Cera redundant because he could do everything Cera could and handle dramatic roles. Then, Adam Driver emerged and he made Jesse Eisenburg redundant because he could do *almost* everything that Jesse Eisenburg could, plus you could imagine a woman wanting to fuck him. The *almost* is what accounts for Michael Cera's slight resurgence.
Aw man, I think Cera's comedic talent blows Eisenberg out of the water. Cera is a specific persona for sure, but in terms of comedic actors I think there are very few who can do what Cera does. Eisenberg can do angstier but I've never seen anything comedic he's done that could hold a candle to Cera.
Brendan raised an eyebrow at the unexpected non-sequitur, put down his copy of Sports Illustrated and looked over where Vince was hunched over a laptop. "Say what?"
"Long dick." Vince replied, distracted. "That's how he can reach the A hole even though his crotch would be too low."
Godzilla with a dick was kinda done in "Shin Godzilla" where Godzilla starts out as a lizard worm and then evolves throughout the film, ending with a shot of little Godzilla-esque humanoids frozen in the moment of ejaculation from the end of Godzilla's "tail." Trippy flick.
"The way Godzilla is grabbing the M and the X with his lil’ Godzilla claws makes me think he’s about to put his wiener through the hole in the A. Maybe it’s the look on his face. That’s the look of a monster about to expose himself. " As a girl, I have seen many a monster with that look on their face right before they exposed themselves. Way to go Vince! You get it!
And this is how I learn the aspect ratio or something is all fucked up on the HBO Max upload of "Under the Silver Lake." The first two minutes have already had like three visual gags cut off.
I guess we do need a hard version of Inspector Clouseau. Thank you Michael F. Assbender.
The planet of the apes films have all been pretty shit tbh. The whole thing about the outbreak in San Francisco was beyond dumb. How many actual monkeys are there in the bay area?
In fairness, there's nowhere in the world with wild chimps, gorillas, and orangutans. (Chimps and gorillas, yes.) And you need all three to tie into the original films. So might as well set it anywhere that has captive great apes.
Wait, did the Wonka poster re-use the red-and-blue pinwheel background from the poster for The Foot Fist Way?
I must say, as someone who loves half-watching streaming Christmas movies on sleepy December Friday nights, this year's crop (Family Switch, Genie, Dashing Through The Snow, the one with Eddie Murphy on Amazon. the one with Brandy/Heather Graham/Jason Biggs on Netflix) looks pretty dire. They can't all be as perfectly fun-stupid as the Princess Switch trilogy, but you gotta at least try to make it in the ballpark.
Someone else who hated The Batman! There are dozens of us!
My wife and I have a 6-month old and both have Friday off. We plan to drop the kid at daycare and go see a movie in theaters for the first time in over a year. Not loving the new releases this weekend (The Marvels, It's a Wonderful Knife) so I'd like to hear any recommendations.
KOTFM is a little long for us to do in theaters (we have to pick the kid up by 4 and the earliest showing is at 1), so I was thinking maybe The Holdovers? Reviews seem good and I like most of Payne's movies, but this one seems a bit treacly. Any under-the-radar options I might be missing? We live in central-NY so no real arthouse theater options.
I guess we could also just watch a streaming movie at home, but we'd like to get out and have an actual date/day to ourselves.
I caught Holdovers over the weekend and while the previews certainly can lead one to thinking it is going to be too saccharine, it tends to be more bittersweet. Good movie and would see it again. If you like other Payne movies you will like it.
If you are near a theater showing The Killer, that is pretty great as well (it will be on netflix later this week).
"The way Godzilla is grabbing the M and the X with his lil’ Godzilla claws makes me think he’s about to put his wiener through the hole in the A."
A hole, Vince. It was right there.
Also I agree with the other guy: The Fall Guy trailer might be the worst thing since colon cancer.
Indeed. After watching the Fall Guy trailer I can now safely say that even Baby Goose and Emily Blunt can be made to look stupid and annoying.
Can't blame the actors' strike for the poor performance of "What Happens Later," since I caught an interview with Meg Ryan which mentioned that it was an independent film and had a waiver: https://www.today.com/popculture/movies/meg-ryan-david-duchovny-what-happens-later-interview-rcna123134
I think way back when, there was Michael Cera and then Jesse Eisenburg emerged and made Michael Cera redundant because he could do everything Cera could and handle dramatic roles. Then, Adam Driver emerged and he made Jesse Eisenburg redundant because he could do *almost* everything that Jesse Eisenburg could, plus you could imagine a woman wanting to fuck him. The *almost* is what accounts for Michael Cera's slight resurgence.
Aw man, I think Cera's comedic talent blows Eisenberg out of the water. Cera is a specific persona for sure, but in terms of comedic actors I think there are very few who can do what Cera does. Eisenberg can do angstier but I've never seen anything comedic he's done that could hold a candle to Cera.
"Godzilla has a long dick"
Brendan raised an eyebrow at the unexpected non-sequitur, put down his copy of Sports Illustrated and looked over where Vince was hunched over a laptop. "Say what?"
"Long dick." Vince replied, distracted. "That's how he can reach the A hole even though his crotch would be too low."
Godzilla with a dick was kinda done in "Shin Godzilla" where Godzilla starts out as a lizard worm and then evolves throughout the film, ending with a shot of little Godzilla-esque humanoids frozen in the moment of ejaculation from the end of Godzilla's "tail." Trippy flick.
"The way Godzilla is grabbing the M and the X with his lil’ Godzilla claws makes me think he’s about to put his wiener through the hole in the A. Maybe it’s the look on his face. That’s the look of a monster about to expose himself. " As a girl, I have seen many a monster with that look on their face right before they exposed themselves. Way to go Vince! You get it!
Ed Helms? I thought it was Dane Cook trying to avoid using his real name.
Anyways, The Myth of the American Sleepover is fantastic, move it up your watchlist.
And this is how I learn the aspect ratio or something is all fucked up on the HBO Max upload of "Under the Silver Lake." The first two minutes have already had like three visual gags cut off.
fuuuu Dune was supposed to come out now but instead I gotta wait until March??
Strikes are clearly bad.
I guess we do need a hard version of Inspector Clouseau. Thank you Michael F. Assbender.
The planet of the apes films have all been pretty shit tbh. The whole thing about the outbreak in San Francisco was beyond dumb. How many actual monkeys are there in the bay area?
Don't you besmirch Charlton Heston like that.
7.753 million apes in the bay area not including lab apes
APES
In fairness, there's nowhere in the world with wild chimps, gorillas, and orangutans. (Chimps and gorillas, yes.) And you need all three to tie into the original films. So might as well set it anywhere that has captive great apes.
Wait, did the Wonka poster re-use the red-and-blue pinwheel background from the poster for The Foot Fist Way?
I must say, as someone who loves half-watching streaming Christmas movies on sleepy December Friday nights, this year's crop (Family Switch, Genie, Dashing Through The Snow, the one with Eddie Murphy on Amazon. the one with Brandy/Heather Graham/Jason Biggs on Netflix) looks pretty dire. They can't all be as perfectly fun-stupid as the Princess Switch trilogy, but you gotta at least try to make it in the ballpark.
Someone else who hated The Batman! There are dozens of us!
My wife and I have a 6-month old and both have Friday off. We plan to drop the kid at daycare and go see a movie in theaters for the first time in over a year. Not loving the new releases this weekend (The Marvels, It's a Wonderful Knife) so I'd like to hear any recommendations.
KOTFM is a little long for us to do in theaters (we have to pick the kid up by 4 and the earliest showing is at 1), so I was thinking maybe The Holdovers? Reviews seem good and I like most of Payne's movies, but this one seems a bit treacly. Any under-the-radar options I might be missing? We live in central-NY so no real arthouse theater options.
I guess we could also just watch a streaming movie at home, but we'd like to get out and have an actual date/day to ourselves.
I caught Holdovers over the weekend and while the previews certainly can lead one to thinking it is going to be too saccharine, it tends to be more bittersweet. Good movie and would see it again. If you like other Payne movies you will like it.
If you are near a theater showing The Killer, that is pretty great as well (it will be on netflix later this week).